Historically, women in Pakistan are not allowed to leave their homes without the company of a man. This is true for other patriarchal societies as well. Women's mobility into the public sphere is restricted so much so that they are confined to the four walls of their homes. Not only their mobility, but their behaviour and activities are also dictated only by the men in their lives. Hence, women are responsible for maintaining the family honor by being obedient to the demands placed on them by these men.

During my field visits to the Karachi slums (katchia badis) and rural areas, I continuously hear stories of women not being allowed to leave their homes without their husbands, brothers or fathers. This means that if a women needs to go to a health center for any sort of health care for herself or her child, she cannot unless she is accompanied.

Sadly, this remind me of a story. A women was pregnant with her 9th child. First of all, she did not want to be pregnant anymore and proposed to her husband that she would like to get her tubes tided. Her husband refused, saying that it was "unislamic" to do so as that would "go against Allah's will" since it is "Allah who allows us to have children." Let me just briefly add that there is no mention of this in the Holy Quran and furthermore, Islam is a faith of intellect. These two are inextricably linked, that one relies on the other.

So this women continued to work during her pregnancy as a house cleaner as the family income was not adequate to meet the needs of the entire family. Additionally, she was very weak and malnourished. During my experience, I have learned that short birth spacing is extremely harmful to the health and well-being of the mother as well as her children due to nutrient deficiencies as well as limited psycho-social interaction. Such was the case with this mother. While at work, she started to bleed and needed to go to the hospital immediately. Since her husband was not home, she was not allowed to leave the house. The local people knew this and hence, did not provide her with any assistance. However, a traditional birth attendant recognized the severity of this situation and travelled for 3 hours in order to get the village lady doctor to see this women. Unfortunately, the lady doctor had been relocated. When the birth attendant returned to this women's house, the women had bled to death....

This story bothered me a lot even though I know this is a regular occurrence. Why do we have such little respect for women? If God created us equally, then why are men given more rights then women? I refuse to buy in to the idea that "people are just not educated enough" or "there is a lack of awareness." First of all, what does it really mean to be "educated?" Second, I think this has more to do with behaviours that are deeply engrained and rooted in culture and tradition. Behaviours are hard to change, especially when that is all you have ever known.