I have been invited to quite a few weddings here by my work colleagues and I enjoyed every single one of them! Each wedding provided to be quite an experience. I love to attend weddings because I am such a hopeless romantic and I love to see the excitement and the anticipation in the couples' eyes.

Let me give you a quick cultural lesson on wedding's in Pakistan.

Mayoon = celebrated at the bride's house, where all her friends and close relatives gather and celebrate with dancing and singing. Drum music is usually accompanied. Henna is usually put on the women's hands as well.

Mayun = a custom of the bride entering into the state of seclusion for eight to fifteen days before the wedding. The bride is free of all chores and errands as the beautification rituals being.

Ubtan (a paste made from turmeric, sandalwood power, herbs and aromatic oils) is prepared for the bride by the groom's mother, which is then applied to the bride's hands and face. It is applied to the bride's skin each day leading up to her wedding.

Dholki = a ceremony where the girl's family (immediate and extended) sing traditional wedding songs as well as popular songs accompanied by a Dholki (drum). I had a great time when I attended my friend's sister's dholki. We were entertained with dancing and singing and not to forget great food!

Mehndi/Rasm-e-Henna = a ceremony held separately for the bride and the groom where henna is placed on the couple's hands. The groom's friends and family bring along sweets and henna for the bride, and the bride's family does the same for the groom. The bride and the groom cannot attend the other's ceremony.

Baraat = is a procession of family, relatives, and friends of the groom that accompany the groom to either the bride’s home or a reception hall for the official wedding ceremony. The groom makes his way to the bride's home on a richly decked horse or in a car and the “baraat” follows in different vehicles. Groom is given warm welcome by the bride’s family with flower garlands and rose petals.

Nikah = an Islamic official wedding ceremony that takes place either at the bride’s home, a reception hall or a Mosque. It is attended by close family members, relatives, and friends of the groom and the bride. Usually, the men and women are made to sit separately, in different rooms, or have a purdah, or curtain, separating them. Verses of the Holy Qur'an is recited-the verses highlighting the significance of a marriage. Nikah-naama is a document of marriage contract, which is registered during the Nikah ceremony. The Nikahnaama contains several terms and conditions that are to be respected by both parties (bride & groom). Both the bride and the groom have to verbally approve of the conditions by saying "Kabool kya" which means "I accept." I guess this is similar to saying ' I do.'

Shaadi = A reception held after the Nikkah. Usually this event takes place in large wedding tents set up in a garden or an open lot. The bride's family is responsible for the reception and arrangements on this day. I will talk more about this a little later..

Rukhsati = An event that takes place after the shaadi when the groom and his family leave together with the bride. The Qur'an is usually held over the bride''s head as she walks from the stage to the exit in order to bless her. Since this event symbolizes the departure of the bride from her parent's home, it is usually a somber occasion. Hence, it becomes a very emotional scene as the bride bids her family goodbye in order to start a new married life with her husband and his family.

I have found that weddings play a big part in the lives of people here. Families save up all their lives only to spend their entire life's savings on the most exquisite weddings. This becomes especially hard on the girl's side as they have to host the Shaadi (reception). The whole of Karachi has everything you need for a wedding. If you drive around the streets of Karachi, you will find HUNDREDS of marriage lawns and tents pitched up especially for this occasion. One block has up to 10 wedding lawns. I wish it could be this easy in Canada. Just find an open space and pitch a tent! No need for renting halls and all the administrative and legal stuff that accompanies it. There are SEVERAL markets and bazaars where one can purchase what ever they need for a wedding. Everything from clothes, shoes, and purses to decorations and gifts.

During these weddings, families pay so much such to put a 'show' on for others. This is true for pretty much all cultures. The bridal and groom party wear the most exquisite outfits and are drowning in gold (not the men, of course). They spend a lot on the most finest cuisine (usually biryani and pillau). And lets not forget gifts for either side of the family. Weddings do not start until late in the night-say 10:30 or 11. Hence, dinner is served REALLY late! Most guest come late and leave right after food is served.

The brides look beautiful but they too have to go through a great ordeal. They have to wear the most heaviest and shiniest outfits with the finest designs and embroidery. They are covered with jewelry from head to toe. They have to wear big earrings on their nose, which makes it difficult for them to eat. It takes 4 hours to get their hair done and 4 hours for their make up. They are told to not smile nor laugh but 'act' shy. Their heads are always kept down, looking at the ground. They are to talk only when spoken to. For two of the weddings I had attended, I could see that the brides really wanted to laugh but couldn't. I felt like tickling them so they could just laugh! Don't worry, I didn't as that is a big no-no.

In every culture, weddings and marriages play a big part in people's lives. This is accompanied by various 'rasams' (traditions). However, it has more so to do with families than the actual couple getting married. Culturally, it is all about the families and the communities rather than the individual. Hence, to make the family happy certain traditions are followed and restrictions obeyed regardless if you understand any of these traditions or not. Even after the wedding when the couple starts their married life together, families continue to play a big part.

Individuals are never an entitity in and of itself. He or she is continously interacting with the environment through a symbiotic relationship.